Falling Off

It's kind of funny.... I've been so on top of the world for several reasons over the last couple months that I totally forgot about my normal state of being depressed this time of year.  With all the running around vacationing and being out of my element, being tired from working out, love troubles, and weather woes, I've spent the last couple of days in a funk that I wasn't able to diagnose as I usually have.  On top of that, I feel like I'm sick, but I can't tell with that either for sure.  I've spent the last two days in bed for some reason.... just not sure why.  It makes me realize that I should sometimes just give in to what I'm experiencing, be it grief or sickness or depression, instead of trying to always be the strong one and push through it.  I'm fortunate to have good friends who check in on me (and mother me... (you mother F-ers know who you are)), but to the others who depend on me, there's no rest for the weary... the show must go on... because the guilt keeps coming, both self-inflicted and flung upon. I'm having a hard time giving a shit about anything right now.  At least before I had food to comfort me.