Friday, April 30, 2010

What Your Sleeping Position Says About You

I am a flip-flopping Fetus postion sleeper...

Fetus position - A whopping 41% of participants sleep in this curled-up manner. Women are twice as likely to rest like this and it is listed as the most common position. These sleepers are said to have a tough exterior but are still sensitive and may appear to be shy but warm up quickly.

Log position - If you sleep on your side with both arms down, you are a social, easy-going person who is trusting, sometimes to the point of being gullible. The study showed 15% of people sleep like a log.

Yearner position - A close third is the side-lying position with both arms out in front of the body, with 13% of partipants sleeping like this. Yearners are noted to be open-minded and still cynical, suspicious, and stubborn about sticking to decisions once they are made.

Soldier position - These sleepers lie on their backs with arms down and kept close to the body. This 8% study is said to be reserved, quiet, without fuss, and hold themselves and others to a high standard. Soldier sleepers have a higher likelihood for snoring due to the flat-back position, which may not cause them to wake up often but may result in a less restful night's sleep.

Freefall position - Those people who lie on their bellies with arms under or wrapped around a pillow with head turned to the side, make up 7% of the population studied. Freefallers are brash, outgoing, and are very uncomfortable with criticism.

Starfish position - Sleepers who lie on their backs with arms up near their head or the pillow account for 5% of participants. These people are good listeners, helpful, and are uncomfortable being the center of attention. People who sleep in starfish position are more likely to snore and to suffer from a poor night's sleep more often.

Thank You Berry Much...

With yesterday getting off to a rocky (and unnerving) start, it only got more 'rocky', so to speak.  In the area where we lost 16 trees from the winter snow, it's hard to replant things that are so small in comparison to what was there.  With a fence, employee area and storage trailer now exposed in view from the wedding area, there's not much I can do, within their budget, to create a barrier, but I did what I could. 

Like an angel, coming down from the heavens, Berry called me and brought me lunch, knowing what a shitty day I was having.  Having started planting some of them before he got there and running into a very rocky and clay-filled terrain, it made it awful to dig the holes I needed.  After lunch, like the great friend that he is, Berry rolled up his sleeves and, pumped up on his homemade southern sweet tea, and he went at it with me for about 4-5 hours and we were able to make some progress.  The Norway Spruce's had root balls on them the size of a large blow-up exercise ball, but with wet dirt replacing the air.  Weighing 200+ pounds (and having a conical root ball) it was extremely hard to get them where they needed to go, but somehow, we managed.  I lost another 3 pounds yesterday.

Like the Norway Spruce's that we planted, our friendship has grown from a seed to a strong root system and foundation able to support the growing nature of our bond.  He has turned out to be a tremendous friend and, as I'm seeing more and more, a quality person.  Not too many people would drop everything and jump into a project that was obviously hard, dirty and exhausting.  Most wouldn't have even shown up or would have ran out of there at the sight of work.  That jumping-in, no-questions-asked, it-takes-a-village-to-raise-a-barn mentality is something that I learned from my Dad... and I'm guessing that Berry learned that from his parents.  I'm happy to call him my friend.  

Thursday, April 29, 2010

What Else Is New

Everyone wonders why I'm a realist with a leaning towards pessimism... 

This morning, I got a call at 6:30 a.m. from 'the boyfriend'... of Mike's, the guy that I accidentally met.  Apparently 'the boyfriend' found my business card in Mike's wallet.  And while I'm appreciative that he called me to inform me of what Mike obviously forgot to tell me, I don't want to be pulled into any relationship problems and I don't have any intention of being a third anything to anyone. 

Normally, I would take this experience and then go into a rant about people cheating and how that is so not me... but I'm too tired and don't care that much to go into it.  Pretend that this is one of those days at school where the teacher is taking hits off his bong under his desk and you don't learn anything.  Actually, the lesson is 'expect nothing, get nothing, no big fucking deal because you knew it was going to happen anyway'.


Wednesday, April 28, 2010

My Day Was Just Ducky


I can't believe it's almost May.  Time is flying by and, lately, I feel like a dog with his head out the car window with life whizzing by me.  When I get in this work mode, I lose track of time and days and all the things that are going on around me.  Since I'm losing my mind as I get older, it's harder for me to concentrate on too many things at once any more... not that the things that are going on aren't somewhat major... I mean, I'm not staying up nights wondering what shirt I'm going to wear with what pants or what color to pick for an accent wall in the bathroom.  There's some major stuff I'm still under pressure with.  For instance, Elaine went into the hospital today for a scheduled surgery to remove the kidney stone that didn't pass last month... and now she's in a lot of pain and they have to figure out why.  Meanwhile, they found a 6 centimeter cyst on her ovaries that they still don't know what's what about.  All the while, I'm her executor for her estate and power of attorney and I really didn't want to think about all that at this point in our lives.

I worked with my brother again today.  I should just stop there and spare you, but if I have to live it first-hand, then you all should at least get (have) to experience it.  With only two more bushes to cut down before cleaning up the project area and being done, my brother found a nest of large eggs (as big as you'd scramble).  So he called me to tell me (I was on my way to the compost site with a load of branches).  Then a duck appeared and he called me to tell me that.  Then the duck was looking through the pile of bushes for it's eggs and he called me to tell me that.  He wondered if ducks would attack (like in the movie Howard the Duck) and he called me to ask me that.  4 phone calls later, I got back to the parking lot to find my brother chasing/tunneling the duck towards the eggs, with the duck taking off and circling and dive-bombing back down again.  If I didn't know for sure that my brother was sober and was being tested, I would have figured him to be high on cracked-cocaine or some shit.  All the while, I kept thinking... how does someone repeatedly fuck over their family with no conscience or remorse and then spend hours putting out an Amber Alert on some found duck eggs, dreaming of a reunion worthy of a Lassie show (the one where Lassie gets lost and Timmy finds her (Lassie, Come Home?))  SEE BELOW.  Requiring constant interaction, I think even my brother was above his stimulation levels for the day and I on my last gay nerve... and I quickly realized that production was a lost hope and I took him home and went back and finished it myself.  This was my day.  This is my life.

Almost a year ago today, I bought a chainsaw and it broke.  I followed the warranty info on the broken part, but the company that was handling it for me went bankrupt, so I took it back to Home Depot, bitched, and got all my money back. Considering that I've cut down probably 50 trees with that thing, it turned out to be a great deal, in the end... and I almost feel badly about it.  In other shopping news, every year for my birthday, DSW Shoe Store sends me a coupon and, if you're lucky and you time it with another coupon, you can save big.  I was able to find my old-school Adidas tennis shoes and, with my $25 off in coupons, I paid $30 for them.  Shopping-wise, it was an awesome day, especially for me who usually doesn't buy anything.

 

Progress (With One Leg in a Bear Trap)

Yesterday was truly an exercise in patience for me... for the simple reason that I had my brother working with me.  Hard to keep focused, needing constant interraction and always thinking he knows the best way which always has a short-cut in it... he can be trying. 

Since he has done nothing but rip my Dad off for the last ten years, he doesn't get the whole 'take care of your tools and they'll take care of you' philosophy... mainly because he has never had to pay for anything himself.  His answer is to beat the shit out of everything and buy a new one (or, rather, me or my Dad buy a new one).  Were it up to him yesterday, I would have been buying a dump truck and a chipper, which would be nice to have, but expensive and not needed in what I do.  Having said that (background story)... I told him to be careful with my chainsaw because, although I was able to cut 40-some trees down with it with no problem, 3 bushes out of 37 and he broke it.  Being right over the hill from the Home Depot, I took it up there (without a receipt) and they gave me a whole new one (surprisingly) and instead of the 14" size, they had to give me the 16" size since they were out.  After that, it went well, less him chewing up my chains one after another.  Again, he's so hard on stuff that it almost makes it not worth having him help.

I received word yesterday that the Marriott's audit will be sometime in the next ten or so days, so I'm kind of backed into a corner again.  Fortunately, what I have done so far to get ready for the big-wig that never showed, has prepared me for the audit, so it's not so bad.  It wouldn't be right though if I weren't backed into some corner though.

Other than that, that's about it for my life right now...  Oh.. Glee was on last night and it was a great show... I've kinda lost interest in AI at this point without Tim on there. 

Monday, April 26, 2010

The Smooth Styles of JC Penney's

What a life... how about these three silly bitches... lying around on the beach in their missy's separates... First of all, who wears heels to the beach... and white, at that (I can only assume that it's after Easter and before Labor Day)... and didn't do a thing to their hair but put a babushka on they nappy heads... and were they having some sort of lesbian romp and had to get up quickly and put on pieces of the other bitch's clothing or was that intentional to dress inter-wovenly?  Shit... where are the husbands that condone this sort of thing?  And how do I get one that would let me carouse about like this?

In this ad, the only thing that's going to 'happen' when this guy wears this outfit, is people are going to piss their pants laughing and he may get beaten about the head and neck for his lack of taste in clothing.  This is the 70's answer to the 80's color-block style.  And what's with that collar?  Yikes!  Really?  You're going to walk out of the house (let alone inside) with that shirt on?

Aiding and Abetting

After yesterday's shopping spree with the boys (girls), I was able to get the new TV all hooked up and now I'm waiting for some cables that I ordered online to come to be able to hook up my computer to my TV... the real reason for getting the TV to begin with.   Being my first flat-screen, I feel like I've joined the ranks of the masses in the 21st century.

Thanks again to Matt for his technical support and combo (last) Xmas (he originally was going to get me speakers for my truck, but that didn't work out) and (pre) birthday gifts, which enabled me to get a bigger-than-planned set... he has contributed to my disease of lazy stupid program watching.  Way to go, Matt (Mehmet from India tech support)!  My bad habits are all your fault.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

What a Great Day

All-in-all, this turned out to be a great day.  I dragged Matt and Berry around to about 5 stores today looking at TV's.  Matt was such a great help (technically) and Berry... well, he tolerated me and was able to use it as an exercise in patience (although I think it wasn't too productive of a lesson)... ah... the young... from one shiny object to the next.

Unexpected Pot of Gold

Yesterday was one of those days... it was predicted that it was going to rain all day long... and around 11 a.m., the sun came shining through.  That's when the guilt set in, so I packed up the truck to go do some work at the Marriott and, in the process, my Aunt called and asked when I was going to stop over her brother-in-law's place because he "had a few limbs down".  So I diverted myself over there to find about 18 huge limbs down, and he wanted me to remove a 30' Birch tree.  Of course (this happens all the time) when I started working, the weather changed and it started sprinkling... all day long.  In a race against the 'predicted' line of thunderstorms, I worked my ass off for 7 hours... removing 6 packed truckloads of branches, so it turned out to be a very productive and profitable day. 

Today, it's a beautiful morning... and it's supposed to be raining again.  I've decided to take a guilt-free day off... I'm going to look at flat-screen TV's today.  We'll see if it lasts... the nice weather AND the guilt-free part. 

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Bring On the Raindrops...

I love that it's raining today... we needed it any way. I've said it before... look how simple songs were in the past... and I'm not embarrassed to say that that's what I do in my bedroom when it's raining... dance around in a purple skirt.

This was a comment under this youtube post, and it's true...

"it seems like back then they were not ashamed of feeling happy, high or not, they liked to make happy songs, now artists are cynical and depressed, they think that feeling happy is ridiculous and that the only way to make it cool for the audience is cursing or being too sexual. I like this song because is so simple, and its really that simple to feel good"

By today's standards, the lyrics would be more like... 'acid rains fallin' on my 'stensions, yo... and I forgot to take my Ritalin, so I'm jacked and I'm going to cut a bitch fer sure'

That's Just a Bunch of Craziness


Friday, April 23, 2010

Ultimate 80's

You have to admit that the 80's had some great, toe-tapping, uplifting, non-sensical music.  Today, while doing landscaping, this came on the radio... you can't help but want to dance around your room in your leg-warmers and Reeboks with your cut-up sweatshirt and matching sweat band.  Go ahead... nobody's lookin'... go for it...

You Go, Mary!

I know I keep saying this, but it's better than when I was bitching all winter long about being lonely and depressed.. but I'm really happy with my life right now.  I truly love doing landscaping (although I am looking forward to the rain we're supposed to get tomorrow (which translates into a break for me)).  It's something that I enjoy and working with the earth has become a part of me... or maybe it always has been.  And I'm good at it... not to pat myself on the back... but I put a lot of effort into not cutting corners and doing things the old-fashioned way and it's showing and is appreciated by my clients.  I just put together another side project beefing up all the outlying beds and islands and replacing some of the trees that we lost with the heavy snow.

Now that camp is open, I'll be heading back down there in a few weeks to start massage again.  I'm trying a new living situation this season and I hope to tailor my time down there to my own experience.  While my friend Matthew has provided a fantastic environment that we worked on together over the last two seasons, it's time for the baby bird to fly out of the nest on my own.  I'm looking forward to getting back to basics.

With my work situations going well, my social life is following suit.  From tired and lonely to a renewed sense of self, I am happy just being by myself right now, surrounded by my friends.  Ok... I actually did meet this really nice guy (yes, again and not planned, he's 24) who works at the Marriott, so we'll see where and if that goes anywhere.  Point is, I feel confident in my abilities and myself and don't NEED to be with anyone.  So with that, I dedicate this as my summer song...

You Can't Fool With Mother Nature

I had a very productive Earth Day, yesterday.  I had to meet the Municipal Authority at my Dad's at 8:30 to go over the city water connection and what needed to be done to hook into it if having well water at the house became a negotiating issue in selling it... then I had breakfast with Elaine at IHOP (yummy strawberry cheesecake pancakes)... then loaded up the truck, went back to my Dad's to take off some carpet tack strips on the stairs (so people wouldn't get hurt) and cleaned the wood floors.. then went to the Marriott and removed a jagger tree equipped with 2 inch prickly jaggers ALL over it along with all the other trees I trimmed in the parkiing lot, took those to the compost site and stopped at my Aunt's to remove a few dead limbs that broke off with the snow but were just hanging from the tree still (having to climb up it to get to them)... finished up back at the Marriott by digging out some patchy grass areas then went home and took apart my hedge trimmer to sharpen the blade and now I can't get it back together again.

The plan was to be ready for mulch on Monday, but with the next wave of storms, looks like next week, starting from tomorrow, will be very wet and unproductive, since it's pretty much not possible to do mulch in the rain.  Blame will fall on me for not harnassing Mother Nature...  this will push us back, which they will not be happy about.  It was going like a stick of butter... not any more.


Wednesday, April 21, 2010

BREAKING NEWS: Press Release

This just in...  Tim Urban dropped from the Troubleinmybubble record label and management agency... 

In unrelated news... Tim Urban voted off tonight after being in the bottom 3...

House Listing...

Finally got the house done and officially listed....

House Listing

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Skinny and Sweet

This morning, right before I left the house, I was feeling skinny so I weighed myself.  Low and behold, I wasn't as skinny and sweet as I thought... 179.... which is down from my fat ass winter weight of 185, but I've been fluctuating around that for a month now.  Today, I went to the Marriott and worked 8 hours pushing a mower (probably 10 miles).... and I weighed myself when I got home and I lost 6 pounds.  Even with the extra weight of the suntan that I got... I still lost.  So I immediately celebrated with some fried chicken tenders that my Dad made.  I'm probably back up to my fat-girl poundage.  Easy come, easy go, easy come back.

Some House Selling Advice....

It's true what they say.... it's all about the view... and entertaining!!

Versatility and Job Security

I've changed careers so many times in my life... I like to try different things, etc.  Right now though, I'm pretty content in what I'm doing.  Just yesterday, my townhouse community landlord approached me about taking over the lawn maintenance contract since the guys that we have (although cute) do a shitty job.  I've bitched about it many times and, apparently, so have the neighbors.  It's a big property, but with this and the Marriott... I'd be set as far as jobs go.  So it doesn't look like I'll be making any career changes any time soon. 

And while I've called myself 'Weed Man' in the past (related to landscaping), it hit me that if I did change jobs, there is something that I could change to that I wouldn't have to get new business cards printed up, albeit illegal.

Monday, April 19, 2010

So Happy I Could Cry

Today at my Dad's was a good day... it was kind of bittersweet though.  With the trees blooming (Flowering Cherry and Lilac) outside and the grass cut... and everything cleaned up inside, it was one of the first times that I half expected my Mom to come out on the porch or around the corner in the kitchen.  Today was emotional as well because not only am I tired of the whole project, but I now realize that my childhood is just about to go up on the sales block.  With the state of the house before, I disassociated myself with it... now, I can see so much history again.  The property has such an old-fashioned charm to it, with the long driveway and huge trees on either side of the front yard.  In the second picture, you can see the long-needle pine tree that I planted as a kid... it was smaller than the Charlie Brown Christmas tree at the time... now look at it.

I finished up a lot of projects today and my Dad cut all the grass.  I got the whole house mulched and put down some decorative rocks.  I got all of my tools gathered up and did a light cleaning on the house.  It looks really great.  We just got done in time for the real estate agent (my friend Kim) to come by and get some measurements and take some pictures.  It is officially ready to be put on the market.  The pictures below are the ones I took myself (you can click on them to see the original size pics)... The next-to-last pic is of the attic (it used to be our playroom), and the last is the satellite view with the yard outlined.










The Blog Post Framework

Yesterday, I was talking to my friend Elaine (who I was about to feature, but after what happened... I'm not so sure)...  You would think that one of my oldest friends who knows everything about me there is to know would be reading my blog, but I'm finding out that that's not exactly so... or to what degree.  I mean, she is extremely busy with work and is always traveling and she usually prints out 20 pages of it and reads it on the plane once a month to catch up.

A week or so ago when I was having that bad couple of days, she couldn't get ahold of me (because I slept 15 hours) and she started worrying... so she finally thought to look at my blog and that might shed some light (since my whole life is vomited in print daily).  After she read it and then we talked, she felt better, and she vowed to "read it every day from now on".  So yesterday when I talked to her, she made it a point to say that she'd been keeping up with it every day and she started spouting off some posts to show her blog knowledge.  The first thing she said was about my friend Matt's dog Nick and how that was great how I brought him home and how was he doing, etc.  After being confused for 8 seconds (which felt like 3.5 minutes), I quickly realized that she was only skimming the first paragraph of each post and, had she read on, she would have known what happened with Nick, etc.

When I'm writing something, there is always this feeling that if it's too long, I'll lose the interest of the reader, so I try to keep it short... but sometimes, a bitch just has to say shit and I need more than a paragraph.  When I put together a post, there's usually the first paragraph, which is the fluffy back-story... then the lead-up and, finally, the dismount tie-in that wraps it all up, usually with a quip or antecdote.  And while some posts may seem like they are going nowhere... there's no point or the point is not in plain sight, I can assure you that, if you stuck it out (and I know some posts take up to 1.5 minutes to read)... it would come together. 

If you were going to skim, check out the blog post name (which usually gives a preview of what's to come)... look through the first paragraph for big and shiny $4.00 words.... and you'd definitely want to read the last paragraph and look at the pictures (which usually tie in somehow). 

YUM !! (Necklaces)

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Nick, Nick, bo bick....

For those of you that have been asking about how Matt is doing... he is managing.  When you lose a beloved pet, you never get over it.  After almost a week, Matt was able to post a nice rememberance on his blog...

Ode To Nick