Happy Thanksgiving... Hug an Indian...

Just keepin' it real, yo...

Tall Tales - Thanksgiving @ Yahoo! Video

Precious... Was, Well.... Anything But

What a fantastic movie.  With subject matter that is hard to watch, I was glued to my seat.  Such riveting performances from new-comer Gabourey Sidibe, Mo'Nique and even Mariah Carey (with no makeup on)... I can see why the movie is getting such buzz and accolades.  It will definitely be a contender for multiple oscars.

Clareece 'Precious' Jones is an iliterate, overweight, black teen in Harlem and comes from a broken family... broken promises, broken laws and broken bones, more like it.  Pregnant with her second child from her..... wait for it.... father..... she takes constant physical and mental beatings from her mother as well.  Thrown out of school for being pregnant, she is given the chance in an alternative school, where she finds out what friendship, love and a second chance is all about.  One bad thing happening to her after another, she still manages to rise above it all to be anything but what her mother is.  This story reminds me so much of my own situation... being a poor, stupid black girl living on a farm with an abusive husband... I used to tell myself.... "all's you need to do is cut him while you are shaving him and you'll be free at last.... free to be reunited with your sister Nettie in Africa and go slummin' around with the likes of Shug Avery"... oh wait, that wasn't me... that was Miss Celie in the Color Purple.

Sadly, the audience was miserable.  With the language being very coarse and the movie being graphic and thematic (to say the least), some people brought their children, from ages 2 - 10, to see it.  I can't even imagine.  And every single person in the movie would not stop talking constantly.  Like it was audience participation or some shit.  Very nerve-racking... but I remained calm and didn't explode (mainly because we were outnumbered and would have been cut), but it ruined it a bit for me.  Still, I give the movie 5 slaps upside the head out of 5.  That's the highest any have gotten on my blog to date.  Definitely a 'must-see' movie.

Progress

Low and behold, we got about 3 minutes of sun today (hope they don't think they are counting that towards Pittsburgh's sunny day statistics)... but it was enough to get me motivated to go over to the other house and finish up the floor and got some of the wanescot glued to the wall and caulked (hehe, caulk)... it's starting to come together.  I may be able to unload that place yet.

Monday Movie Madness night was recently changed to Tuesday Night Theater (TNT).  We're going to see the critically acclaimed movie 'Precious' and my favorite Fuji Apple Chicken Salad at Panera beforehand.  Woo Woo... big night out!

A Little Bit of Funny

Xmas is Quickly Approaching

With the weather we have been having, it's hard to believe that Turkey Day is here and Xmas is only a month beyond.  When I was growing up, we used to have a foot of snow on the ground from Nov 1st until March, it seemed.  Now, despite the threat of a hard winter from the 'officials', it hardly seems like we're going to see any snow at all.  And me with my new 4X4 revved up and ready to go, looks like jumping curbs at Walmart will be the most 'off-roading' I will see.

I have experienced a lot of death in the family in the month of December (My Mom, Shelby, my Aunt, and 2 Uncles), so it's never a good time for me to begin with, so I thought I would make a concerted effort this year.  Ever since my Mom passed, she took Xmas with her, so to speak.  My Dad doesn't decorate any more, he didn't have people over like we used to, he doesn't make his pizelles... things change.  Now, living with him, I really wanted to make it special for him this year, but with my seminar on the 5th and 6th, and leaving for Florida on the 7th through the 21st, I'll hardly be here.  It's also strange in Florida around Xmas.. with the hot weather, palm trees and beach, it's hardly a scene out of Norman Rockwell.  More like... "over the Intercoastal and past the beach, to Aunt Ida's house in Miami we go... the cab knows the way to carry the gay, past the margarheta bars and T-shirt places and 8 lane highways...." (well, you get the picture).  I also wanted to have a family and friends get together here at the new place.... first Xmas here and all.  And after a 'friend' pointedly allowed me to have it only after reviewing, editing and supervising the guest list, I decided not to do it at all and, subsequently, wouldn't have been here any way.

I am thankful that my Dad is still kicking.  The man doesn't have a bad bone in his body... he'd give the shirt off his back (which is probably mine, since he gets all my hand-me-downs now that he's shrinking)... if there is anyone who deserves to become a Saint, it's him.  I have tried to pattern myself after him my whole life... truly a great person.  I am thankful for my friends... we have an interesting bunch and while we tease each other about our shortcomings, it's in that ferver that is a true knowing of each other... a special bond... a keeping it real and pushing each other to be better than we are... at least those who are willing to look at themselves.  Lastly, I am thankful to find the strength to keep moving forward in my life.  I want to challenge myself and who I am, what I'm about and how I treat people.  It's only when you are in the company of those greater than you that you strive to be more... and I, now , have some truly incredible people around me.  I'm a more peaceful me in sorting through the crap and moving on, be it with people I thought were friends, my own self-help or whatever comes at me.

A Good Weekend

Although the weather turned out a little shitty, it was acutally a good weekend. I went with 12 friends to dinner last night... we went to a cowboy bar/restaurant called Cadillac Ranch. It just opened a week ago and it was a madhouse. It took them only 30 minutes to get us seated, regarless of the reservation, but the rest of it took at least two hours. What an unorganized mess. They have a bull that you can ride too... her name was Erica... she was our waitress. (kidding) Our whole section seemed to be full of gays. Three tables out of 6.  Of course, I was the fifth wheel... all couples except me.  That makes it hard and, although I am on a chit-chat website and have met some nice guys (one in particular from Atlanta)... didn't do me any good when I stood on the doorstep waiting for my goodnight kiss.


I woke up today full of piss and vinegar to get out and do something exercisanal... was going to take another 20 mile bike ride, but Moe and Terry called and we went to see Twilight... Full Moon. I saw the first one and it was rather magical, although I'm not a big sci-fi horror vampirey person. This one was pure rubbish. The only good part of the whole movie was the first time that little (now big and manyly muscle) Taylor Lautner took his shirt off. The theater was filled with little girls (including Me, Moe and Terry) and possibly another gay or two spread here and there. Well..... when he pulled his shirt up, there wasn't a little girl, gay or straight man that didn't gasp in delight... then we all giggled like schoolgirls. I am definitely from the 'Jacob' camp... as was mostly everyone else (obviously).. his manly-muscle arms and manly-muscle legs... wet from the rain... dripping... glistening on his taught body..... (STAY TUNED FOR A BRIEF INTERMISSION) .............................................................................................................. alrighty then. Ok, I'm back.  It was so hard to focus on the movie any time he was on the screen... and I sensed that from everyone around me as well.  The girl behind me was so mad when he went to kiss Bella and didn't follow through so she could see it.  Anyway, the movie was contrite, overly dramatic, 3 1/2 hours too long... and with Bella being a miserable, overwrought bitch, I find it hard to believe that Edward and Jacob would be fighting over her at all. They definitely set it up for the next one, 'Eclipse', which I will not be seeing. I give it two pastey-white Roberts out of 5, only because of the juicy, little Taylor Lautner.

YUM!

Although the blog has to stay true to who I am, I sometimes wonder, even though the audience is broad, do I push the gay envelope too much. Please take a minute to participate in the poll to the right...

Progress

It's been no secret (because I've been blogging about it) that I've been procrastinating lately.  I guess because I'm not doing massages or landscaping jobs, that somehow I'm not being productive.  Truth is, besides getting a lot of stuff done at my Dad's (in the everlasting project list), I've been doing some of the things that I've procrastinated about last year... like going through my closet and getting rid of stuff, organizing my computer files, going through stray music CD's, old software programs, etc.  It's good to purge... last weekends garage sale was the throughway to organization for me.  It feels good.

Greener Grass...

A few days ago, I joined a meet and greet chat site... and I've met some really nice people. Some locally, which will be nice to hang out with as friends, but it always seems like the good ones are in some other town, far away (hey Brian). What's funny is when I talk to two nice people from the same city and they both talk about nobody good in their city. I guess we're more willing to look outside of our own backyard. Didn't Dorothy teach us anything? Maybe it's because gay guys set themselves up to fail... figuring if they meet someone in another city that's nice, it lingers their hope that there are good guys out there, but they don't have to commit to one, even though they say they want to. I'm not much of a chit-chatter (except on here and in person), so it's frustrating telling someone in Tel Aviv how my day went.


Today was one of those miserable, damp days that Pittsburgh is known for. I really didn't feel like doing anything today, but pushed myself to go over the house and get the wanescoting cut but not glued on the wall, and laid the new floor for the bathroom. I have a dentist appointment tomorrow morning. Guessing I'll feel like shit afterwards... oh well, tomorrow is shot.


It's light up night here in Pittsburgh on Friday night. All the buildings downtown have to turn all their lights on, and they unveil the Xmas tree, open the skating rink, and Macy's unveils it's holiday windows. 200,000 yinzers later, it's a total cluster-fuck. Oh, and yes.... thereare fireworks afterwards. We're infamous for our fireworks displays. The wind changes directions and someone lights off a friggin' firework of some sort.  I'm not one for crowds and stupid people, or I would go... it's usually a good time if you can get down there early, get drunk and look at all the pretty lights and whatnot.

Don't Send Me Hate Mail... I'm Just the Messenger of Prejudice

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan


What is a Yankee?
The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.


Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it's worth it.


What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over?
Doughnuts


Why is air a lot like sex?
Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.


What do you call a smart Blonde?
A golden retriever.


What do attorneys use for birth control?
Their personalities.


What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
10 years and 45 lbs


What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
45 minutes


What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife.


Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism.


Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
Because those men already have boyfriends.


What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you


What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.


Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex?
Because they have cotton balls.


What's the difference between a porcupine and BMW?
A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.


What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
'Are you sure it's mine?'


Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
Mace will do that to you.


Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia ?
Everyone has the same DNA.


Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.


Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.


Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A different bar.


Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a blond baby?
They named him 'Sum Ting Wong'.


What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A speech impediment.


What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half-mast?
They're hiring.


What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with... 'a recipe'.


How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word?
Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!


What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?
A northern fairytale begins 'Once upon a time ...' -A southern fairytale begins 'Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit....


Why is there no Disneyland in China?
No one's tall enough to go on the good rides

Verizon Elves

In keeping with the on-going debate with Matt over Verizon and AT&T... here's the next installment of the Verizon ads...

Progress

Yesterday, I had the appointment to show my Dad's house.  After having to call her 20 minutes after we were supposed to meet, she showed up in her big fat BMW with her come-fuck-me boots on and designer this and that... looking for a McMansion... or at least a spot to stick her McMansion on.  That's the problem with the house... the yard is great but we're asking more than an empty lot would be, mainly because we're selling a house, not an empty lot.  And the house, by today's gimme-gimme standards, was never meant to house the glutton-like mentality of present-day yuppies with all their clothes and shit.  Why... when we were young, we had one outfit and one toy... that was it... and we all shared rooms and worked the farm... and after a long day's work, we got a good night's sleep and knew we had done all we could... we were a family and it didn't matter what we had or didn't, but we were together at the end of the day.... night MaryEllen... night John-boy... (oh, wait... that wasn't us....).  

Now It All Makes Sense...

I have never been a real fan of Thanksgiving food... turkey is always dry and makes you tired... not big on cranberrry sauce or gravy or yams... in fact, my Mom usually made spaghetti for us.  But the one thing that there was never any question about was my dislike for pumpkin pie.  Not sure why... maybe the consistency... maybe the taste... but it always looked and tasted like... well... crap to me... now it all makes sense....

Yum !

A New Dawn

After my tirade last night, I could barely get to sleep.  Fortunately, I had taped SNL with January Jones hosting and, with it being totally not funny, that helped... a lot.  I'm not sure if it's that I put so much into my friendships that I get disappointed when I get a small percentage back in return, I expect too much (like respect and kind human nature) from people or I'm just a glutton for punishment in the friends that I choose sometimes and I am cracking from within.  I am just absolutely stunned that people act the way they do.  For those close to the issue, it all makes sense.  For those not, I'm sure I sound like a raving lunatic... but it would all come together if you knew.  I have to find a way to process this in a more healthy way, and I think a start is removing myself from the situation.  I don't let go of things as I should.  I hold myself to a high, unselfish moral standard and wish others would as well.


I got a call about my Dad's house and I'm on my way over there to show it.  It's not ready to show and I plan on listing it when I'm done, hopefully in the next week or so before Florida... but I put a sign out front just for the hell of it.  If I can save the commission, than that's all the better.  You never know.

The Separation of the 'Continents'

Tonight, we went to see 2012.  Although the predictions of the end of the world from many sources have yet to be proven, you would think all communication and infrastructure from the East side of Pittsburgh were already wiped out, since I can't seem to get any respectful response from my 'friends' over there.  14 texts and emails later, I still wasn't sure who was showing up.  It's not that difficult to make up your fucking mind.  Since we basically have had to give in to their irrational mental block all along with regard to having to go over a bridge or through a tunnel or spending $2 on gas to come to this side... meeting for everything on that side of town (regardless of the out-numbering of the west-siders and it only being 15 minutes to the other side) to pacify and keep the peace became the norm.  I think it's official that no one wants to oblige any more.  Having met some new friends tonight, looks like the ones that regularly show up and people that are interested in getting together are all on this side any way.  Must be something in the water that causes the rude behavior and ADHD on that side.  I am officially done inviting the children to grown-up night.  I just wind up being the teacher trying to herd the kids away from the shiny objects when the short bus doors go flying open.  Except for the days prior trying to get everyone to focus (which is a frustration for me and usually ruins my time), the night goes more quietly any way.  If it sounds like I am pissed, I am.

The drama of getting them to make up their minds was only BARELY overshadowed by the 2.5 hour visual vomit of the end of the world as portrayed in 2012.  If you subtracted all the cliches, ridiculous and narrow escapes, dramatic acts of humanity, obvious demises of the bad guys... and two hours of dramatic visual overload and computer generation, you would be left with a message... buy a hybrid before we're all fucked, although it's probably too late any way.  While entertaining and somewhat edge-of-your-seatish... anyone with half a brain gave up on a plot and acting 20 minutes in and just watched the carnage, which was pretty awesome in scale.  I'd give it 3 days left out of 5... you still have time to save yourself... (hint) build an ark and learn Swahili.

Biking Fools

Last night, we all went to see "Pirate Radio", about the rock and roll movement in the 60's in England.  I'm not one for the English comedy, finding the humor dry and usually naughty and I have a hard time understanding them.  The characters were all quirky, loveable and well-developed, the songs were all favorites and the whole movie was one of the best 'feel-good' movies I have seen in a long time.  With rock and roll illegal to play on the mainland, the radio station had to open up on a boat in the ocean and the goverment, as you could imagine, didn't like that.  The people in the theatre were all boomers or slightly younger... everyone seemed to have a great time.  I highly, highly, highly recommend it.... 4 1/2 Beatles albums out of 5.

Today, Matt and I went to Ohiopyle... a little town right on the whitewater river... it's mainly know for that, but also has great hiking and biking trails.  My bike has seen a lot of miles... sadly, only in the back of a U-Haul truck from residence to residence.  I haven't used it much in the 8 or so years I've had it, but made up for it today.  We managed to ride 20 miles.  I'm exhausted, but it was so worth it... it was a very nice, calm, relaxing day.  We had lunch at an open-air cafe.  Some other friends didn't make it, so it was just the two of us which made it nice.

Ho, ho.... ha ha ha!

Matt, who is what I consider a technology geek, and I have a long-standing debate over the iphone and Verizon's phones... and along with that, Verizon vs. AT&T.  Verizon recently fought back and came out with these holiday ads that are hilarious...

Happy, Sunny Day

The garage sale was a complete success... made $499 dollars... and, as I expected, all the things that I thought were going to go first because they were nice or valuable were left to the end, and the crap that I was embarrassed to put out was snatched right up.  It's a weird menality... garage sale people... take everything, throw it in a box and make them root through it and they love it.  Clean it, organize it and display it nicely and they don't touch it.  I'm so glad to have all of it gone... I had to take a few boxes down to charity, other than that, most of it went.  I have my garage back.  I attempted to get fifteen bucks for my Dad, stating that he does dishes, and thought one lady was going to fork over the money.

Matthew's dog was put down yesterday.  He was a 13 year old Cocker Spaniel and had a number of problems that probably would have been harder to heal and would have required some patience, time and money.  He came from an abusive household and (although we tease Matthew that the dog went through the witness protection program (he changed it's name from Scuddles to Spencer, threw out it's toys and bedding and gave him a shave/bath on the first day)), the dog had a better life than he probably would have.  If Spencer was smaller, Matthew would have walked around with him in his pocket book, I'm sure.  And although I can't recall that I've ever seen Matthew petting the dog, Arron constantly played with him.  They seem to be bouncing back, already talking about getting another one and have names picked out already.  It's amazing how much our pets are there for us and go through so much with us.  They just don't live long enough.  It's heart-wrenching.  I miss Shelby.

It's 66 degrees out today... Matt and I are going biking tomorrow to enjoy the weather. Tonight, we're all off to see Pirate Radio.

Progress

I'm all set for the sale tomorrow morning.  This is the first time, out of the many, many garage sales that I've had that I'm actually holding in a garage.  It's so nice to be able to wake up, stretch and hit the garage door opener and be ready to go without having to lug shit out onto the lawn.  No early-birds... they'll have to wait until the door is open.  I hate the mentality of the garage sale people.  Haggling, bitching, conversing... just give me the money and get out.  So sorry you don't have anything better to do on a sunny Saturday morning but root through my old shit.  Boo hoo for you.

Speaking of sunny... I can't believe this weather.  We're going to have sunny, warm (mid-sixties) weather for the next 5 or 6 days.  It'll hardly make my trip to Florida hard for the people stuck here with the, normally, 35 degree weather.  I'll have to find something else to rub in their faces.  In the meantime, I'm set to go December 5th to Philly for the class, then fly to Ft. Lauderdale for two weeks.   I'll be back December 21st... just in time to hang the stockings by the gas fireplace with care.