A Blaze of Glory...

Tonight, I was lying in bed watching Paris Hilton's 'My New BFF' when I got a call from my neighbor across the street from my old house... apparently the house next door to mine (see early-on in my blog when I was leaving the neighborhood and I berated my next door neighbors several times for being trashy scum) was burning down. By the time I fast forwarded to see who Paris 't.t.y.n.'d, I guess they got it under control... because when I got there, it was out and there were about 50 hot firemen surrounding my old house. If I knew it were that easy to get them there when I lived there, I would have set my house on fire long ago... big manly-muscle arms... big manly-muscle legs.... (but I digress). There was smoldering, alright, but not in my house... more like in my knickers.

It was strange being there in the crowd looking at my old house. It was like I was standing outside my life (or the life that I had blocked out) watching... As if I still lived there. I'm so glad I'm out of that neighborhood. A fight, a shooting, a fire... always something happening. The owners next door abandoned their house right around the time I left, so who knows, it could have been arson. Imagine if I still lived there... what could have happened... it would have really interrupted more of My New BFF, that's for sure.

Stay tuned to your local station for breaking news... Meanwhile (now it's 3:30 a.m.), I wanted to watch the premiere of a new season of Hell's Kitchen tonight... I love when Gordon Ramsey calls the interns silly cows.

Hi.... I'm Bruno...

I went to see Bruno last night... I would have to say that I liked Borat better, but I am a sucker for third-world humor much more than gay humor. Do I feel exposed or mocked or ridiculed? No... just uncomfortable. The crowd in the theater seemed to be ok with it all, but it made me cringe a bit. With blatant, crude nudity and a reinforcement of stereotypes, it just wasn't funny and came across as trying too hard to be a gay Borat. And with the camera following him around like a mockumentary, there were times where you didn't know if you were supposed to think that he was being filmed or not, which made it confusing. All in all, I give it 2.5 petunias out of 5. If you want to see gay... go see 35 year old Daniel Radcliffe playing a 16 year old wizard wanna-be... riding around on a broom calling himself 'The Chosen One'... now that's gay.

Completely Done

Today, I finished putting the big rocks and 'crumbles' in the landscaping... crumbles are the broken up rocks that I use to make the bigger rocks look like they've been there for a while and not placed... I also plant grasses, etc. around the rocks to look as though they've sprouted up in between the rocks.

There's a phase II to the Marriott... they filled in their outdoor pool and created a wedding/party nook... I'll be doing a lot of the same landscaping techniques there as well. It's kind of my signature style... 'just walked upon in the woods' rather than red mulch and evenly spaced rocks, etc.

I'm done now with all my other projects... I have a few things to do this week, but will be leaving for a big weekend at camp on Thursday through Sunday... then I leave Monday for Florida for 10 days... 8 in Ft. Lauderdale and 2 in Key West. No weeds. No mulch. No mess.

Progress... (Updated) Completed Project

After removing 46 trees of various sizes, 52 bushes and put in over 150 man-hours, I am nearing the end of the Marriott project, which included a left and right atrium area and various other main entrance areas. Although they were skeptical at first thoughout the project as it was coming together, in the end, they were thrilled with it. With so many bushes and trees crammed into these areas that nothing was growing (except together and then choking each other out), it was a hard concept for them to grasp... space... and that there didn't need to be something in every open space. Also, my natural, 'walked-up-on-it-in-the-woods' style threw them, but it truly is the personality of the entire property. Next year, when everything doubles in size, it will be really beautiful. Incidentally, I did not plant any of the flowers. First, I wouldn't have used such K-Mart varieties in this application... and they are so sporatically placed... the mark of the idiot landscaper that they have (which I will probably replace soon).

I will be finishing up on Monday and skating through the rest of the week... then I leave on the 27th for Ft. Lauderdale and Key West... I just extended the trip by two days... will be back on August 6th now. When I get back, I will start working on my Dad's house... cleaning and painting, etc... to get it ready to be listed. The people interested have been pissing about (how very England-like of me)... so I'm just moving ahead. With little work, I can get more for it.

BP finally paid up totally... but I am going to bill them for the partially-completed work and not go back. They lost another person in the accounting office... something is drastically wrong with them. Hopefully, I will do the other project at the Marriott and then take over the weekly maintenance from here on out for them.

It's The Little Things... Very Little...

I installed a hummingbird feeder at camp this weekend and within an hour... had hummingbirds swarming all around... sometimes 4 at a time. They're really awesome to watch... what's great is the feeder that I got is designed so that they actually perch, rather than hover... you get to see more of them that way.

In a related bird story... while cutting down trees on Friday at the Marriott, I un-nested 3 baby birds, but didn't notice them until I was unloading the branches at the compost site... so I took them and put them in the woods along with some bread to eat... surely they probably died by now... oops. Up 4 hummingbirds, down three baby birds... I guess I'm one ahead?

Progress...

No word on the appraisal yet. I received a small check from BP today, but I'm still on strike officially and may not go back to work for them at all. I started back working on the Marriott project today... at least they pay me a deposit upfront. I also talked to the GM about taking over the weekly cutting and landscaping for them, replacing the idiots that they have currently. My brother started back to his old job yesterday. All is calm so far. 17 days until sun, sand and no weeds. I've decided to stay in Key West for a few days. I wish I extended my trip now.

Trying to lighten things up a bit after a lot of heavy info....

Ladies Night Out...

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Day Three....

I finally had someone respond to my emails and phone calls. They sent a check out for the oldest two invoice and the message was forwarded on to me by the District Manager with just "FYI" as the communication... like I should be thrilled that they are throwing me a bone. I guess they would be thrilled if they only got paid for 2 days of the week instead of 5 in their paychecks? I had to send a well-constructed email back demanding all of it before I would proceed with work again. Or pay me that and the $2,200 that I have already done in prep work that wasn't billed yet and I will go on my way. I hope they choose the latter.

The Continuing Saga...

I've always joked that my life story is like a Jerry Springer episode... I think it would actually take a little longer than the normal show time... I'll try to keep it simple with bullet points:

-Doris Buchannon married John Hockenberry when she was 15 and had 4 kids.

-After many years, she met Charles Drexler and started stepping out on John.

-They had a mystery girl that died.

-She became pregnant with Larry and John Hockenberry (not married to her any more) came down and signed the birth certificate like he was the father, even though it was Charles', who was married. Larry was born deaf and he had some bum problems (he was born without one) so, because the laws at the time prohibited handicapped kids from being adopted, he went to live with a foster family, where he stayed the rest of his life. I met him a few years back. Difficult situation.

-Doris and Charles carried on like trashy whores for some time and she became pregnant with Dan, my current brother (half-brother).

-She met George Panyko and since they both were married and had kids from previous marriages, he told her to get rid of it and he'd marry her.

-George and his brother, Andy, worked on the railroad with my adoptive dad, Butch. So Andy went in to work trying to hock this kid to anyone that would take it. Butch and Dorothy said, 'yea, sure, why not... how much trouble can this kid be?' (hindsight is twenty-twenty) and named him Dan (who is currently out of jail, btw).

-Doris dumped her four kids off with John and lived the high-life for a while with George, traveling, etc.

-Doris became pregnant with me. There's some controversy as to whether George is my birth father, because apparently they were not getting along... he may or may not have had a vasectomy and didn't think that I was his so she must have been cheating... blah blah blah.

-Doris went back to Butch and Dorothy singing 'oops, I did it again...' and my parents took me as well when I was brand new (pre-gay).

-George killed himself shortly thereafter (shot himself in the head in the bedroom and the kids found him) because of the grief over having another kid, was it his, things weren't going right.... blah blah blah.

-Doris was on her way to a funeral in Ohio in 1971 and tried to outrun a bus at an intersection. Bus-1 Doris-0. She died.

-The three boys went to live with John Hockenberry, their Dad... and Judy went to California to live with her Aunt.

Although it would probably take a DNA test to confirm it, after seeing the picture the other day, I feel certain that George is my birth father because of the resemblance. I'm not sure how I will pursue this... my four half-siblings want me to remain in their lives and come to Grove City to meet the other two (I figure I can stop at the outlets if it goes poorly and the day won't be a total bust). George's side has been less than friendly, but I technically have some half-siblings on that side as well. We'll see how I proceed. That pretty much wraps up the main points... finding out all this information has been the saga part... more to come.

The Proposal....

Last night, we went to see The Proposal. After the day I had, it was a welcomed escape. The movie was really good... great chemistry between Ryan and Sandra... cute premise... plenty of laughs... great scenery. I balked at the $9.75 I had to pay until the scene with Ryan Reynolds standing there buck naked (almost)... that was worth $6.00 alone. Sandra Bullock is the new Lucy. She has great comedic timing and has the physical comedy thing down pat. Ryan has a hairy chest and dimples and could just stand there doing nothing and I'd be satisfied. All in all, I give it 4 out of 5 petunias (what did you expect the rating system to be like from a landscaper?).

On my plate today is watching the house depreciate in twenty minutes (appraisal), drilling my teeth (dentist) and fixing my past financial mess (lawyer). Throw in a little picket line and asshole brother for good measure... any one want to trade? I'm looking for an easier day... like getting my eyes poked out...

DAY ONE (Redux)

Well, here we go again. BP owes me a lot of money. Such a bad week (weather-wise) to be on strike... with 5 days of sunny weather.

On a side note... my brother is out of jail. Let the fun begin.

Pretty Much Sure....

Tonight, I met my half-sister and one of my half-brothers. It's very overwhelming and shocking to me. After searching and wondering every time I passed someone on the street, I am able to put faces and information to piece my life together. They brought these pictures of my birth mother and father... and although I have always been skeptical for many reasons as to whether he was my birth father, after seeing the top picture (of him around my age now), I feel relatively certain that he is my birth father. There's so much resemblance. For the first time in my life, I feel like I have a starting point, and that I wasn't just dropped out of the sky. I have my mother's nomadic tendencies... and possibly my father's anxiety. More to come where I left off in the story. This is just too much for me to process right now.

Happy Fourth!

It was a great long weekend... except I need a vacation from my vacation. Didn't really do much relaxing, even with the 60 degrees/raining weather the whole time. I wound up doing 9 massages which was just enough. With the weather being so beautiful this week coming up, hopefully I will get a lot accomplished and knock some of the stores out. The house is being appraised tomorrow and I have a meeting with the lawyer on Tuesday. Tonight I am meeting with my half-sister (she called me on Thursday). Hope you all had a good Fourth!

Progress (or lack thereof)

This week has been a mixed bag of tricks... some ups, some downs... mostly some status quo's. With the weather being crappy, I didn't get too much accomplished work-wise. I did get some things organized and cleaned at our house. BP owes me money again (more than before) so I am getting nervous. I will make a big push to get more done next week. I'm leaving to go down to camp for a four-day weekend Thursday morning... I'll be busy with massages. Last year I did 18 over two days. Not fun. I booked a flight to go to Ft. Lauderdale at the end of the month to stay at my friend's condo. 7 full days of no one and nothing to do. If I had to pull the metal hurricane doors down over the window, no big deal. I'm looking forward to the peace and quiet. This will give me a push to get the BP's done by then. Then I'll have to figure out the Marriott's scheduling. My Dad was peeing blood earlier this week... after a trip to the emergency room, turns out he had a bladder infection and is on medication. The person interested in buying my Dad's house was so kind to inform us that, although my Dad has been walking around for 50 years thinking he had 2 acres, it's only 1.2 acres, which changes the whole ball game. And although they are still interested, we have to get an appraisal and/or adjust the price. I have an appointment with a lawyer later on today to get my old house situation resolved.

My life is a bunch of problems. Most of my friends are sympathetic, compassionate, understanding and supportive. Some are not... are they really my friend then? Three steps forward and two steps back, hoping that I don't trip and tear my stockings trying to get through the maze of life.

Sidewalk Chalk Artist

We Lost One Of Our Own...

Another celebrity death this week. Born William Mays in McKees Rocks, Pa., on July 20, 1958, Mays developed his style demonstrating knives, mops and other "As Seen on TV" gadgets on Atlantic City's boardwalk. For years he worked as a hired gun on the state fair and home show circuits, attracting crowds with his booming voice and genial manner.

Dumpster Drama...

After enjoying a refreshing beverage while on my way to camp, I decided to stop and get rid of some trash in my car when I came up on Griselda, pitching her newborn into the dumpster behind the Walmart in Moundsville, West Virginia. Apparently she has had more babies pulled out of her than from a burning orphanage and this had not been her first unwanted pregnancy. I understand that they are starring her in a new Fox reality TV show... the Really Made-Up Housewives of Suburban Wheeling and Surrounding Hollows. I was able to get a few snapshots before she scampered back to her Chevy Citation and drove off.

In The Fires of Hell...

Today, plain and simple, was the worst day of my life as far as pain and suffering goes. It took 3 of us 10 hours to move (shovel up into a wheel barrow, wheel it across the parking lot of a large store, pull it up over the curb, dump it and spread it with a rake) 32 yards of mulch. There's nothing quite like watching the truck dump it out onto the pavement and you get this sinking feeling in your stomach. That's 48,000 pounds of mulch. To give you an idea, that's 9,600 5-lb bags of dog food... 1,568 shovels and 228 wheel barrows full... that's almost a filled dump truck (18-wheeler size, tri-axel with a big horn and dice in the mirror with a chrome dog on the hood). Add to it the temperature, humidity, temperature of the steaming mulch and the average pile to dump site being about 200 feet... it really is incredible to think about how fucking miserable the whole ordeal was. Imagine in the olden days when they did everything by hand. Altogether, I have 60 man-hours into one store from clean up to mulching. Over the last couple of days, I have lost 6-7 pounds. For this week, we will have moved 67 yards of mulch. Thats....

Left For Dead....

With my half-sister not calling to meet me... it brings back the same feelings of when I was brand new, sitting on the doorstep... left for dead... with nothing more than the clothes on my back and my woobie in-hand. Alone... no one wanting me... Do I smell?