Don't be a Deck

To me, there are pessimists... then there are optimists on the other end of the spectrum... and then there's me... a realist... right in the middle.  I'm far too productive to be a pessimist... and not fucking cheery enough to be an optimist.  Over time, I've seen that bitching about something doesn't get it done... and thinking nothing will go wrong and everything will be great just sets yourself up for disappointment when, inevitably, things go awry.  I think with my sense of humor and sarcasm, I tend to get labeled as negative... when I'm only trying to be funny.  I also think that the 'meat and potatoes' of life is in the part where you roll your sleeves up and get dirty.  That's where we learn lessons... that's where we gain knowledge... and that's where we get things done.  Like I said, bitching about it accomplishes nothing... and with having your head in the clouds, you miss what's going on right in front of you.  The heart of life is in the details.

I have an odd sense of what fun is.  For instance, I can go to an amusement park and eat food and sit on a bench and watch people and have the time of my life not riding one ride.  I'm not a thrill-seeker... never have been.. but I'm deep into experiences.  I get a lot of pleasure from accomplishment which is probably why I work so much.  I don't look for fun in every situation because there just sometimes isn't any to be found.  Not every experience has to be life-altering or a memorable occasion or the time of my life.  For people who do look for those things and then don't find it, they become bored or complacent or apathetic and lack focus.  There are many things that I am not, but focus and perseverance are not things that I lack.  When I see a shitty job ahead of me, I buckle down and get it done.  I'm really good with tedium, repetition and challenge.  I don't cut corners and do it the right way.  There's plenty of time for fun later... but serious and relentless are how I am in the throws of it.  I guess that's why people come to me to get things done.  Both a blessing and a curse to be like this, I guess.  My friend Kyle is an optimist... and what I like about him is that he sets the bar for me in thinking positively, but doesn't get upset and is patient with me when I don't hit the mark.  He helps me strive to be better... a lot of people in my life actually do.

I'm not going to lie... building the deck down at camp was a bitch.  A pessimist would have looked at it and said 'forget it'.  And an optimist would have expected everything to go right... and they would have been sorely disappointed.  Me... I expected it to be shitty... it was... and I got it done.  From hand-picking the 124 treated 12 foot long heavy boards, loading them onto three carts that I could barely move, checking out at the Lowes, loading them into a rented truck, driving 45 minutes up the mountain, unloading them by myself, returning the truck and driving back, laying out the 12' X 36' foundation by myself, digging the post holes, taking my shirt off and getting sun-burned to a crisp, running 5 boards short in the middle of a storm with 50 mile-an-hour winds and having to drive two hours back next week to finish just the 5 boards... it all sucked, like I knew it would.  And yet, standing on this side of the project, I can honestly say that I had a fun time because, standing back at the end and looking at the finished product, the sense of accomplishment that I have is overwhelming.  Sure, there was a beautiful view up in the mountains... a nice breeze most of the time... I got to see Scott who set me up with a great room for free... those are all things that made it bearable.  But 'getting 'er done' is priceless... and knowing that there's nothing that you can't accomplish if you put your mind to it is what I live for.