I Can't Get No... Satisfaction

"In my day...", she would start her sentence... and I knew that I was in for one of my Mom's recollections of a bygone era when things were simpler and people worked together towards the common goal and for the greater good... and respected each other... blah, blah, blah.  I remember rolling my eyes and thinking "ugh, spare me".  And now as an adult, I know exactly what she meant, as I find myself longing for my bygone era.  It's funny how the time period that I want to go back to that I recall as simpler, etc... was when I was a kid... and that was such a 'lawless' period of decline in morality for her and her era was much better than mine.  By this logic and pattern of previous times being better than the current, we should be able to trace all the way back to perfect, if there is such a place or time.

She was right, though... people have changed and things have changed.  And not that change isn't good, but it isn't good when it isn't good... and it's not going in a good direction right now.  There's definitely a deterioration in people's attitude towards each other.  "One for all" is more like "all for one", with people mostly interested in what they can get rather than give.  Human interaction is replaced by disconnection in a time when we are the most socially and technologically connected.  Entitlement, greed and disrespect are applauded and accepted as the norm.  It's almost as though people didn't know any better... like they were never taught right from wrong.  When did this happen?  What's to blame?  The internet... dual-income households with a lack of parenting... or maybe just the way that we communicate with each other nowadays? 

Lately, there were several things that have happened in different aspects of my life (career, friendships, relationships, etc.) that all ended up with the same result:  disappointment.  Maybe there's some validity to the logic that you can only disappointment yourself by setting your expectations too high, but how low can you set them before you are no longer true to yourself... that you are disrespecting and devaluing yourself.. or that you have abandoned your morals?  These people make you think you are crazy for expecting them to act like a basic, decent human being when that should be ground zero, not something that you aspire to or, worse, don't even shoot for.  

The sorrow that I feel as a result of letting my guard down and trusting or relying on someone only to be constantly disappointed time after time  is crippling.  It's a cumulative effect... like a snowball rolling downhill.  You just get to a point where you shield yourself from social interaction... from trying... from involvement or even leaving the house.  I find myself blocking myself from anything that can let me down, including my Facebook feed, the news or any other source.  For me, it's to the point that I am avoiding everyone and everything.  I just can't take it any more.

I'm not looking for perfection, in fact, my expectations and standards are so low and accepting, that I think that when I get disappointed, I already expected it and I am left disappointed in myself for lowering myself to that level and setting myself up knowingly.

If I lower my expectations any further, I will be down on the ground, and since I'm already getting screwed, I might as well lie back and throw my legs up and enjoy it... that's other's expectation of me, it seems.